Author: Miles Corbin
It’s official: **New Year’s Eve isn’t a celebration—it’s a marketing campaign in formalwear**. A peer-reviewed study from the Institute for…
Your worst life choices are now a franchise. In a move that blends personal trauma with studio greed, Hollywood has…
Your post-holiday guilt just got a price tag. Whole Foods has launched the **“Reset Ritual Kit”**—a $89 curated box of…
Your 2025 regrets are now legally obsolete. In a bipartisan move that blends legislative theater with collective denial, Congress has…
Your digital self-loathing just became mandatory. Instagram has rolled out **“Year in Cringe 2025”**—a personalized, algorithmically curated highlight reel of…
Your New Year’s optimism just got a surcharge. Major banks have quietly introduced a **“Hope Tax”**—a 5–12% fee applied to…
Your seat at the holiday table just got a prerequisite: **emotional pre-approval**. In a move that blends family tradition with…
Your year-end bonus just got a prerequisite: **a notarized “Gratitude Report.”** In a move that blends holiday cheer with corporate…
Your New Year’s resolutions just got an upgrade—for a fee. A new app, ResoMind AI, now uses your 2025 data—failed…
Your holiday generosity just got a safety net—for a fee. Amazon has quietly launched **“Regret Returns Insurance”**, a $19.99 add-on…