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Internet Absurdity
Google removes “truth” from search results to reduce conflict
February 4, 2026
Instagram launches year in cringe recap you cant skip
January 4, 2026
Amazon sells regret returns insurance for holiday gifts
December 10, 2025
Netflix releases ambient regret channel for exes
November 28, 2025
Google calendar now blocks unproductive emotions
November 2, 2025
Breaking Satire
Us launches democracy-as-a-service for global clients
February 6, 2026
Congress passes fresh start act to erase 2026 mistakes
January 6, 2026
Banks charge hope tax on new year’s eve transfers
January 1, 2026
Boss demands gratitude report before year-end bonus
December 19, 2025
Congress bans sadness on zoom calls
November 8, 2025
Satirical Science
Scientists confirm new year’s eve is just capitalism in a top hat
January 21, 2026
Harvard offers degree in emotional detachment
December 8, 2025
Whole foods launches $40 silence for inner peace
November 22, 2025
Starbucks launches silent sip coffee for socially anxious
October 25, 2025
New york bans eye contact to reduce friction
October 24, 2025
Viral Culture
Whole foods sells reset ritual kit for january 2nd only
January 16, 2026
Family holiday dinner now requires emotional pre-approval
December 29, 2025
Zara drops quiet despair collection in beige regret
November 24, 2025
New York City installs loneliness lanes for solo walkers
November 5, 2025
H&M drops quiet bankruptcy collection in gray denial
October 30, 2025
AI & Tech
Your ai freelancer just underbid you on fiverr
January 27, 2026
AI generates your 2026 resolutions based on 2025 failures
December 17, 2025
NYC installs eye contact fines to reduce social pressure
December 5, 2025
New iphone listens to thoughts charges extra for feedback
December 1, 2025
AI promoted over human after writing boss’s speech
November 8, 2025
Games
Olympics now offers “artificial snow insurance” for fans
February 8, 2026
Fifa mandates all players wear nft cleats by 2026
February 1, 2026
IOC sells carbon offsets for your olympic guilt
January 24, 2026
Hollywood announces cinematic universe of my regrets
January 18, 2026
WNBA Drama Men Discover: The Game Wasn’t the Point
September 24, 2025
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